don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
