i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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