We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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