Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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