your thong is hanging out like whoa
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
