You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Help. Why am I so naked?
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