i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
