When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
