If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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