no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Randomize
