Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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