dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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