my mouth tastes like poor choices
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
