I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
