awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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