You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I just found a bag of teeth...
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
