So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
