we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
