why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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