he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
