Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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