Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
