I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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