Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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