Yo dont text me then not text me
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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