Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
The air was thick with penises
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize
