My friends, they love my intelligence
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
