Apparently you make a good broom.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
