you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Randomize
