is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
