I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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