Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
