im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize