So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
