I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
smell my finger.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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