I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
