i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Randomize
