Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
