There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
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