That's intense
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
