woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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