like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
