forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
She's the barista slut.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
