okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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