Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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