No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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