No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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