She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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