Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
you never un-have a 4some
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
