brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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