You're my little dorito
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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