is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
